Pardon me? YOU are tired?

I am, perhaps, tired. Just a wee little bit. OK, I am more tired than I have ever been in my entire life - and that even counts tiredness cumulatively.

So I was a little unwilling to accept the complaints of tiredness from a sales clerk yesterday at American Eagle, where I was returning an ill-fitting blazer. She moped about behind the counter moaning about how tired she was and it was seriously all I could do not to a) laugh in her face b) throw something at her. LADY, YOU DON'T KNOW TIRED. In case you're reading this.

From now on in life, I will only accept "tired" as a description from parents of young children, the elderly and pregnant women (just wait though!). Possibly people deplaning from red-eye flights overseas. For everyone else I will think you mean either "lazy", "hungover" or "bored".